Wow, the month has really gotten away from me.  Not too much has gone on, other than a change in my antidepressants.  Dr. Tween switched my Zoloft to Cymbalta, so I'm currently weaning off one and adding in the other.  I'll be completely off the Zoloft by the end of next week.  I have only noticed a tiny difference.  I still get very drowsy, but it's a little later in the day.  I'm still waking up early in the morning, but it's less often than before.  I see her today, so I'm sure she will think that's progress.

I received my 'Ticket to Work' from the SSA yesterday, so I can be retrained to a new occupation now, if I want.  I have absolutely no idea what I would want to do.  It's not feasible right now as it is, but the idea of doing something new does cross my mind from time to time.  I don't think I want to stay home forever, but what would I ultimately want to do, be capable of doing?  I just don't know the answer to that question.

When I've thought of working, I can't conceive of a job that does not require the kind of demands that I have been accustomed to meeting.  The kind that ultimately make me sick.  It's the only kind of work I've ever done, really.  The jobs where I have had less demands, I've spent in pursuit of the next higher position that did have greater demands.  I have always been ambitious.  I don't see that changing for me.  I don't think I can be different.

Does that mean I should be self-employed?  Doing what, exactly?  I have some ideas, but I don't think I'd be able to pay the bills doing them, either.  It's all very premature at this point, but I have to think about it at least a little. 

I do wish I had a passion for something.  Sadly, I don't.